You wanted humor. Here. I’ll give you humor.
7 Reasons You Should Quit Your Day Job by According2g.com
1.Your boss is an asshole! Let’s face it. They have no idea what it’s like to be in the trenches. While they are sitting in their offices surfing the internet and pretending they don’t use Facebook, you are working your ass off for a fraction of what they make!
2. Your co-workers. Doesn’t it make you want to blow your brains out when you have to hear about someone’s kids – and you have to pretend to care! Worse yet, a discussion about what reality TV programs they watched last night? It makes me want to say “hold on – let me put my ipod on and blast it before you start speaking.” Then when it comes to actually doing work, they make every excuse in the book why they can’t perform the job they were hired to do.
3. The Kitchen. Barely drinkable coffee, Splenda packets and someone’s leftovers in the fridge from the early 2000s. There has to be more to life than this!
4. The Work Flow. BC (Before computers), it made sense to have to work 40 hour work weeks. You had to do a lot of extra work that has been streamlined in the “modern age.” So how come the work week hasn’t been streamlined. I’d rather have an extra hour off in the afternoon instead of playing on the internet pretending to be busy and waiting for the bell to ring, so to speak.
5. The Air Conditioning. I am really over wearing a winter jacket in the summer time!
6. The Dress Code. Microsoft Excel does not know the difference if I am wearing a suit or if I am in the nude. If I have a client meeting, I’ll make sure I am presentable. I resent the fact that most of my jeans cost more than my dress pants and yet it’s not appropriate for me to be comfortable for 8 hours a day while I work. I’ll be more productive if I am not annoyed by wearing unnecessary clothes. That goes for ties as well. It constricts my throat to have a useless piece of clothing so close to my wind pipe. Also, I’d like to point out that it’s totally sexist to allow women to wear sleeveless dresses and fancy open toed sandals when men are forced to cover up.
7. The actual job itself. Can you believe that people are arrogant enough to think they are more important than you because they have a Vice President title? Vice President of what? Let’s create a new position – CEA – Chief Executive Asshole!